Q. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is a Tottenham Hotspur supporter. "Hate Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit ? You have a gun with two bullets. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. Your Dark Sage Green Aesthetic Pictures images are accessible in this blog. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()). Sunday was a rather bizarre event. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. Q: How do you casterate a Gunners supporter? What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common? 0 Comments. So the guy from Manchester says, well since I'm from ManCHESTer, i'll get the chest. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." A: Nice tattoo Result from The London Stadium: West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham Hotspur 1 (Kane 89 minutes). They cant believe it, he has single-handedly got a draw against Spurs!They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. Potter: Chelsea players back me amid poor run, LIVE Transfer Talk: Chelsea keen to open talks over Gvardiol, Leaders Napoli suffer shock loss as Lazio go 2nd, Dortmund beat Leipzig to go top of Bundesliga, Spirit make NWSL history by signing 15-year-old, Sunil Chhetri's controversial winner against Kerala Blasters explained: by the laws, and Chhetri himself, Arsenal target Caicedo signs new Brighton deal, Bengaluru FC win 1-0 after Kerala Blasters FC forfeit match, Sources: Firmino to leave Liverpool in summer, Raul and Valverde are keeping Madrid prodigy Alvaro's feet on the ground, Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. A: The bucket. Whats the difference between Liz Truss and Tottenham Hotspur?Liz Truss has no sons. Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. "The other man replied "It's quarter to five. Whats the problem with Martin degaard?Odegaard wouldnt shoot Hitler if he had a gun. Q: What does a fine wine and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? AN Arsenal fan has trolled Tottenham by wearing a Gunners shirt in the home end during the North London derby. Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two the last of which was lifted in 1961. Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Tottenham Hotspur tickets? Under an interim coach, which new players can break through for Brazil? The Gunners raced to a two-goal lead in the first half of the north London derby as they t Enjoy the team's latest comic relief and have a laugh at their expense, from FIFA to Scunthorpe! Your Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans pics are available in this web. The Spurs fan continued, "And look at this - here's another miracle. A: They can't string three "Ws" together. 4. 62 NuzzlesK 8 yr. ago What does an Arsenal fan do when his team wins a trophy? ", "Nope", The copper replied, "I already know that under every Arsenal cap is a cunt!". To receive credit as the author, enter your information below. Mark White has been a staff writer on FourFourTwo since joining in January 2020, writing pieces for both online and the magazine. Former Arsenal wonderkid now available to face Tottenham in upcoming Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. Why Arsenal fans must be wishing they had Tottenham chairman Daniel A: A mosquito stops sucking. (Whos there?)Wenger. He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" Great! Laughing at Tottenham will sustain a lot of supporters during the summer, but asking Spurs to accept their place in football's grand design quietly invites Arsenal to do likewise. Ouch. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. Q: What do I have in common with Tottenham? ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Arsenal tickets? This site uses cookies to personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy. I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. "No way Richard," says his mate "of course we'll still be pals!! Please refresh the page and try again. What did the guy do when a kinky girl asked him to humiliate her?He bought her a Tottenham shirt. Well, were having trouble getting motivated for this game. "He couldn't go to certain places for dinner or walk freely in London because of the anger of the Tottenham fans. Arsenal are no strangers when it comes to mocking local rivals Tottenham. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Finally, things might be starting to turn our way! I want Arsenal to win the Champions League.Santa: So what color of the dragon are we talking about here? The Spurs fan takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the Arsenal fan. All of the sudden Tom Thumb says, "You know, how do I know I'm the world's smallest man? "Why I'm proud to be a Liverpool supporter. Jessica Amlee document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()). Three aged soccer fans enter a church. Tottenham 0-2 Arsenal: Gunners fans dreaming of Premier League title What are the three people you can never advise? There was a problem. Q: Did you hear that Arsenal doesn't have a website? Spurs supporters were left annoyed over the message, as they insisted that it was an unnecessary cheap shot. You can explore arsenal fifa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" You can wrap a word in square brackets to make it appear bold. the other one wore no knickers and she supported Arsenal. What do Tottenham Hotspur and excellent wine have in common?They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much, and are only enjoyed on select occasions. After they crawl out of their cars, the Spurs fan says. "A Pedophile?" Topics:.css-wpf514{color:#72B97D;}Football, Arsenal, Tottenham Hotspur, Premier League, Jake Paul FINALLY proves he is a 'professional boxer' with incredible video after Tommy Fury defeat, Fans claim Saudi Pro League is 'scripted' after Cristiano Ronaldo and Martin Campana's 'bizarre' one-on-one encounter, Alan Smith's horrific leg break injury while playing for Man United 17 years ago left him struggling to walk, Fans cant believe this South Sudan goalkeeper is only 18 years old, Oleksandr Zinchenko tipped to win Premier League 'Player of the Season' award, Arsenal fan claims only one player from Bayern's 2012/13 side would start in their current team. In such page, we additionally have number of images out there. Arsenal and Tottenham are currently battling for the top four. "A large amount of our best weapons and munitions have just been captured, sir.". Q: What team comes beatween your legs and your back? ", So the reporter starts again: "Gooner git kills family pet". The bad news for Arsenal is that in much the same way as Tottenham's repetitious subordination to their rivals has become a punchline, Arsenal invite jokes of their own by being stuck in their own time loop of disappointment. You tell it want kind of music you want to listen to, and it automatically changes. Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Gunners fan? I waited for Two hours in the cold.". What is so strange about The Gunners defeat to Man Utd?They had Jesus, Mohamed, and Ram in their team and still lost to the devils. Whats a pirates favorite football club?Arrrrrrrsenal. Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. We are nothing without our fans and this section is dedicated to our loyal supporters across the globe. Q: What do you call 100 Tottenham Hotspur supporters at the bottom of a cliff? They called the police and then, for decency, decided to cover her up. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Tottenham Hotspur supporters, too. A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? Q: How do you stop a Gunners supporter from beating his wife? Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and an Arsenal striker? Q: Why did god invent alcohol? He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. A: Because they never have any points. Tottenham Hotspur Jokes - Spurs Jokes (You can preview and edit on the next page), Upload 1-4 Pictures or Graphics (optional). ", This satisfies the woman, who immediately gets back into the car and drives for home. ", The boy interrupts again: "I'm not a Rangers fan either. Arsenal Story JokesArsene Wenger was to meet his new girlfriend outside the Cinema at 7pm, at 9pm she had still not arrived, so he went home furious. What is the difference between Arsenals players going to Chelsea and Chelseas players going to Arsenal?One goes to retire while the other goes to win trophies. SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal. A: Because Arsenal supporters have started to make them up themselves. "Why I'm proud to be a Liverpool supporter. Entering your story is easy to do. Its God, and he says, Welcome! Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. Have a funny joke on Arsenal? You have a gun with two bullets. Tottenham fans responded in similar fashion to a jibe made by Thierry Henry this week. Q: What is the difference between an Arsenal supporter and a baby? Mikel Arteta's men moved eight points clear at the top of the Premier League. "can I have a Big Mac! Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. Tottenham fan kicks Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale in back after Arsenal star admits Mikel Arteta's side have "scars" from last season Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. Arsenal Jokes - SoccerManiak My car is completely demolished but this bottle of whiskey didn't break. Just type!Your story will appear on a Web page exactly the way you enter it here. A big cheer goes up as the screen shows West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham 0 He is beating Spurs all by himself!Anyway, a few more beers later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers, It must be full time now, lets see how he got on! They put the TV on. Q: What is the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a cup of tea? A: Every fall they go into hibernation. Meanwhile, a Manchester United star faces a snub from . There were three football fans one each from the clubs Arsenal, Manchester City and Liverpool they were walking in the desert and found a dead camel. Required fields are marked *. On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. To see all content on The Sun, please use the Site Map. She said, "I am not going out with you now, we are finished". It is not the first time that an Arsenal fan has gotten away with it too, with another supporter also going viral for doing similar in the away game against Chelsea. 40 Lyktan 8 yr. ago Funny you say that. The Gunners fan was thinking: 'That Spurs fan must have kissed Megan Fox who went to slap him, missed him and slapped me instead. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: tracey, jhonyrondo, aajjtablet, Jmkinna. Emmanuel Adebayor Get insight to top players, instructions & drills and extensive coverage of equipment. Whats the difference between The Emirates and a cactus?With the cactus, the pricks are on the outside. I will eat the heart Arsenal Jokes Back to: Sports Jokes Follow @quickjokes Q: What do you call 100 Arsenal supporters at the bottom of a cliff? So far, he has been punched, spat at, kicked, and verbally abused. ", It was lean pickings one winter but eventually they managed to catch a mouse and are discussing how they will divide it up. Arsenal fan Laura Woods twists knife in to Tottenham supporter Jamie O Im looking for a rubbish tip.The other man said, Arsenal to win the Premier League., A woman was reading a newspaper one morning when she mentioned a piece of news to her husband.Take a look at this, dear. Enjoy the team's latest comic relief and have a laugh at their expense, from FIFA to Scunthorpe! 'Jokes About ArsenalWhy did God make Arsenal supporters smelly?So blind people could laugh at them too!FC Arsenal JokesWhat do you call 100 Arsenal supporters at the bottom of a cliff?A good start!Arsenal FC JokesWhat do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest.Funny Arsenal JokesWhat do you say to a Gunners supporter with a good looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo.Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan that does well on an IQ test?A cheat.Arsenal Funny JokesWhy do housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and come second!Arsenal Funny JokesAt Highbury, what is the difference between the words disciplinary and football?Disciplinary is the only one associated with the word action.Arsenal JokesHow come Arsenal fans dont fall asleep during a match?The smell of their ground keeps them awake.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do Arsenal fans do after Arsenal wins the Champions League?They put away their Play Stations.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan with half a brain?Gifted.Arsenal Super JokesWhat does a 3 pin plug and Arsenal Football Club have in common?Theyre both useless in Europe.Joking About ArsenalWhat is the second highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Horlicks.Arsenal Hate JokesThe seven dwarfs are down in the mines when there is a cave-in.Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them.In the distance a voice shouts out "Arsenal" are good enough to win the European Cup. They said lets split it based on the soccer clubs we support. Instagram - Facebook - YouTube@SoccerManiak801. Q: Why are Tottenham Hotspur jokes getting dumb and dumber? Johnny comes to the front of the class. Whats up? He asks. Why are Bayern fans sad?No Arsenal again in UCL this season. The Englishman made the move to Arsenal after his contract at fierce rivals Tottenham had An encyclopedia of football shirts and boots knowledge both past and present Mark has also been to the FA Cup and League Cup finals for FFT and has written pieces for the mag ranging on subjects from Bobby Robson's season at Barcelona to Robinho's career. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. Be it the home match against Leicester City in the season 2015/16 or the away match in Europa League R16 at Zagreb in season 2020/21, Spurs find a way to cheer their rival fans.In the current season, Tottenhams last-minute failure against Sporting Lisbon extended Antonio Contes dreadful champions league record. A former Arsenal academy star, Bennacer has the chance to gain some favourable points with his ex-north London side with a big performance against Tottenham in the Champions League, and. A: Intelligent Tottenham supporters. Youd never do something like that, would you?Of course not! exclaimed her husband. Q: What does a Gunners fan do when his team has won the Champions League? not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?Because hes a Spurs supporter. What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win a trophy?Turns off the Xbox. Q: What's the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and Arsenal? Future Publishing Limited Quay House, The Ambury, How do you make an Arsenal fan a millionaire?Tell them to save up for the UCL final. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and a Spurs striker? And they only scored at the very very end, said the teammates.Maradonna says, No, No, I have, Ive let you down! ''Yes - but I couldn't get anyway near it for the Arsenal supporters! Piers Morgan joked Arsenal don't need Mykhailo Mudryk as he watched his beloved side beat Tottenham. There's nothing worth craping on! And Arsenal have poked fun at Antonio Conte's side by displaying a cheeky message on their official store. Had a player called David Dicks. Click here to upload more images (optional). There is, however, one exception. Arsenal fans still celebrate in song the glory years when they enjoyed title victory on enemy territory at Tottenham in the Double-winning year of 1971 and again under Arsene Wenger in 2004. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days.". Q: What do I have in common with Arsenal? A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while! He takes another one and jumps.The third passenger was Mikel Arteta: I am the Manager of Arsenal FC and I am one of the most creative, most intelligent, and well-remembered football players. Arsenal's crown in 2004. He always reacts like that when we lose a match. The car radio automatically switches to an Arse match on Capital "Gooner" Gold. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 35 Tottenham Jokes You Cannot Share With Spurs Fans. There are three friends. The rude-abega. Tottenham fans make the same joke as Thierry Henry mocks Arsenal rivals Last season, during a match against Reading , Gunners supporters chanted non-stop for Rocastle for the first 10 minutes of the fixture . Primary He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. On the way, she says, "Classical". 35 Tottenham Jokes You Can't Share With Spurs Followers What trophy will Arsenal win this season?August invincibles. Reckless Driver Taking enjoyment from the travails of rival clubs and players is football's dark matter: a constant force, essential to the very structure of the universe, but lurking murkily in the background. Tottenham Hotspur Jokes Back to: Sports Jokes Follow @quickjokes Q: What do you call 100 Tottenham Hotspur supporters at the bottom of a cliff? A: A good start! A man is sitting in a pub with his Jack Russell dog on Tuesday night. Since 1961:Man has walked on the moon.England has won a World Cup.The Berlin Wall was put up.The Berlin Wall was pulled down.Color television has been invented.Internet has been invented.Lots of people have Netflix and chilled.People have started paying in Cryptocurrency.But Spurs still havent won the league. Top 10 hilarious jokes on Arsenal - Sportskeeda Arsenal's highlight of an otherwise intermittently miserable season arrived on the final round of fixtures as they somehow secured their best Premier League finish in 11 years, just weeks after discontent aimed at manager Arsene Wenger and owner Stan Kroenke spilled over into planned protest in a home game against Norwich City. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. )Emery day Arsenal fans are hoping for a better season! This is where you can join supporters clubs, follow Arsenal on social media, download exclusive wallpapers and vote for your player of the month. I set my XBOX password to "Tottenhams Defense". Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Arsenal.' A: Shoot the Arsenal Fan. A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. While Tottenham are normally the butt of everyone's jokes on Deadline Day with their customary trolley dash after everyone is already fixed up, now it is the other way around with Spurs fans . You all know its familiar contours: fail to challenge for the title, cling on for a Champions League place, finish second in the group stage in the following season and then get knocked out at the last-16. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. But in amid the delight and schadenfreude enveloping the red half of north London, there is a lesson, too, for Arsenal fans about the sport's cyclical nature. If you find this site serviceableness, please support us by sharing this posts to your preference social media accounts like Facebook, Instagram and so on or you can also Download this blog page with the title Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans by using Ctrl + D for devices a laptop with a Windows operating system or Command + D for laptops with an Apple operating system. For example [my story] would show as my story on the Web page containing your story.TIP: Since most people scan Web pages, include your best thoughts in your first paragraph. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. Q: Did you hear that Tottenham Hotspur doesn't have a website? A: The accused. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Ever since the Gunners made the move from south of the river to Islington in 1913, there's been needle between the red and white sides of north London. It's North London Derby time. I came up with this today at the grocery store, and I'm not a dad, so all you dads out there, here's one for your arsenal. They slaughter the sheep and use their wool for warmth until they become hungry.The Hartlepool fan says, Im from Hartlepool so Ill have the heart. The Liverpool fan says, Im from Liverpool so Ill have the liver.At last, the Arsenal fan says, Urm Im not hungry.. A: The tea stays in the cup longer! Q: Why are Tottenham strikers like grizzly bears? An Arsenal fan is walking past White Hart Lane and sees three season tickets nailed to the wall. "I've good news and bad news for you this morning, sir." A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. )Gunner be a long season for Arsenal at this rate! But always above Spurs. Unleash your creativity & share you story! Were totally in their heads rent free. Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. and a mosquito? A: A good start! A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! asks Lukas . Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? September 14, 2022, 6:44 pm Arsenal Jokes - Gunners Jokes - Jokes4us.com A: Ask a Tottenham Hotspur supporter! A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. Have a better joke about Tottenham to mock your mates? A pause, and a smile. The general shifted in his seat and looked down at the table. by Jessica Amlee What should you do? A plane with 5 passengers was about to crash mid-air and there were only 4 parachutes.The first passenger is Cristiano Ronaldo: Im the worlds best footballer, and my fans still need me. "Arsenal Story JokesA woman buys a car in London. The former Sky Sports presenter has long had a bee in his bonnet about the Arsenal manager being outside of his technical area for long periods of matches. Why did the Spurs have been forced to rename their ground White Lane?Because their Hart was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold. A: Ask an Arsenal supporter! "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". , to which God replied, In ten years. The disappointed admirer sulks away, exclaiming, Thats a shame; Ill probably be dead by then.The Arsenal fan and his walking cane push the first fan to the side as he sulks. Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly? He looked at the others and asked, "Who the hell is Martin Keown? The third cat says "I support Arsenal, I'm not that hungry thanks", They aren't that highly rated and no one really knows much about them, but apparently they're a small club from North London. All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. 'The season's almost over!'. Q: Who delivers Arsenals Christmas presents? Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. ''Did you visit the Wailing Wall? Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? What did the Arsenal fan say when they won the FA Cup?Im gunner celebrate all night long!. Why do ducks fly over White Hart Lane upside down? ", Another messaged: "This is such a good marketing technique to get more clicks on their website. While in Heaven's waiting room, they were all entitled to a private conference with God, who would answer for them one question. For example: Dallas is known for cowboys, San Francisco was the place for the miners, 49ers, to bring their gold and claims, Islignton was famous as being home of the Artillery Regiment, thus "Arsenal," Milwauke HAD brewing.
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