Add to Collection. I don't love my colleague, but she's having my baby The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. My friends-with-benefits and I are having a baby (6 months along). 10 Behaviors Women Show When They're With Their True Love I don't feel that he is someone that I want to be with forever. We were fighting like crazy right before we found out she was pregnant. Privacy Policy. His baby mama got engaged to some dude while pregnant calls her fiance the kid's 'daddy', despite my friend wanting to be a father to his child. If you don't, pursuing. Being in a loveless relationship is not a good example for the LO you already have and the one on the way. Why is she with you? Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. At least you know your decision to not hook up with a guy was definitely the right one if he insults you for it. I know this is not the time to criticise as the harm has already been caused, but i will still ask: If you claim you dnt love someone, how on earth did u get involved with her, let alone put her in the family way? It's not that they don't want to. I'm supposed to get married in a month. My boyfriend cheated on me with his baby mama and now she is pregnant but I still love him HELP!! JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. THEN, MAYBE THEY BREAK UP CUZ THEY CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. They had to do it because the marriage was arranged or demanded, as their families saw them as a burden and financial responsibility to be passed on to a man who was willing to take her off their hands. NO BABY no matter what deserves to be killed. YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. Apply for wic and food stamps and move in with family. I've been in one relationship like it and told myself I wouldn't be in one again. They finally divorced when I was 19. marriage should not be a punishment or a form of contract. BE A MANam done. We work hard to share our most timely and active conversations with you. She's told me I'll get to see the kid and stuff but she doesn't want me in her life anymore because I make her too unhappy. When One Partner Doesn't Want a Baby - Parents It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. Don't get me wrong here, my daughter can destroy with the best of them. I don't want to burden her with any of this, especially now that she needs to be calm and feel secure. This is reason why i always advice Ladies that they need to STOP creating soul ties by sexing guys Sex isnt better than love its about time you Let the men know in upfront that you are not having sex before marriage. Girl sits on her partner, he turning her on the back. You shouldn't have a baby unless you're in a committed relationship and have a foundation of financial and emotional security. My only advice is to make sure you don't make your or your wife or your baby's life miserable. If you don't like him, you don't have to live with him or use him. In some cases it works, but for many it doesn't. His family is great also. You can't force yourself to love him. So you have been together 9yrs, do you have other children you need to think about as well? It happens almost all the time that children involved in such situations rather suffer the consequencies. A friend of mine just had a kid w/ someone 1-2 weeks before meeting his current GF (who he loves but is probably leaving him over this - who can blame her?) If I do something to hurt their father then im hurting my children because they love him. And beware if your list of reasons is merely a hollow echo of your partner's. 3. I have heard that arranged marriages actually have a better long term outcome because of this. I think it's so hard for me to love this baby because I don't love my partner. Why would you do that? That's when one of them dropped the term . Some of us got promoted while pregnant or found new jobs, it is not impossible. Also, if it's bad now it will only get worse once the baby is here. My Best Friend's Daughter Called ME Daddy While I Popped Her Cherry If you want to be a dad, the fear that you'll only see your kid every other weekend and maybe once a week is legit. But men can still get baby fever. SCENARION 4: HAVE AN OBORTION. Boyfriend wants a baby. I don't. | Mumsnet Having a baby can create a bond that encourages mature personal growth and strengthens a couple's commitment to each other -- but that doesn't happen overnight, and more often, it doesn't. I want to leave my 4 months pregnant girlfriend !! This is nuts. My eldest is 3 then one nearly 2 and one due any time, we dont fight too much but dont love each other, dont even like each other, I just dont want the kids not to have family days and stuff? Ex gf keeps driving past my house!!? My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. After all, what is marriage if there is no happiness? Forgotting that there's gonna be 3 children in his life forever? Twins & Multiples: Your Tentative Time Table, Planned c section too presumptuous??? She got pregnant 3 months after meeting him. No love. Keep reading for our tips and advice, and then give Pregnancy & Fatherhood Solutions a call today at (915) 249-1344 or visit us online to . Chandra is a mom of three boys (8, 4, and 3) and the founder of Oh Lovely Day, a lifestyle blog with a honest look at motherhood.She is trying to create more of an open dialogue with a no . As opposed to hanging out with friends and other men she isn't in love with, she may be much more outgoing and boisterous. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. We are deciding if we should divorce now or later when she is bigger. But shes not the type, shes fond of me un-necessarily. I need advice too. NOW WHY IS IT THAT SO MANY OF US HAD MESSED UP CHILDHOOD? Long story short. You wouldn't happen to be burning a bra right about now would you? On top of that, my age (early forties) scared me into accepting the situation thinking that i am too old to start all over again and wasting more time. She was expressing her feelings and thoughts about feeling like she won't love her child which she should probably talk to her doctor or a therapist about since I'm pretty sure there is a form of depression you can have before having the child but can't think of the name of it off the top of my head. I'm curious to find out how it turned out for you. I just put myself on hold. To cut a long story short I'm in a very My Pregnant Girlfriend is Pushing Me Away. The end result was the same my siblings and I had the worse upbringing. Saturday 4 Mar 2023 10:00 am. There is very little physical attraction. Good luck. Ex My moving on process. :(. You're a dude she just met, maybe at a bar, maybe on a dating site. The 10 Best OnlyFans Porn and OnlyFans XXX Creators of 2023 I know that my kids love us both. Having a baby with someone you don't love. THE TRUTH IS THAT NO MATTER LOVE CANNOT BE FORCED. Nobody really knows what to expect when having a baby, but it does change everything, even if you're determined it won't. Some people may view the prospect of that change as scary and they may doubt their parental skills." When I had my first baby as a young single mom, I didn't have a car and I figured it out with the help of my family. Moreland told me, "Some moms have that immediate, overwhelming, love-at-first-sight feeling with their newborns; others don't. And that's okay. SCENARIO 1: STAY WITH HER BECUASE SHE IS PREGNANT (THIS IS THE FOUNDATION OF THE RELATIONSHIP). U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? 1) If you seriously just want the child, but not the mother, you know this can never happen unless you have an agreement with your girlfriend. 'I want a baby and he/she doesn't - what should I do?' - GoodTo no one is going to be happy in that relationship. He started cheating and I would cry myself to sleep. I wish I wasn't pregnant by him. When Bonding Isn't Immediate: Feeling Like You Don't Love Your Baby Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? The Stages of Wanting to Have a Baby, by Age From being adorably clueless to using all the condoms to #MomLife. This difficult parent-child dynamic is most typical of families where one or both parents are narcissistic, but it's not exclusive to narcissists only. Shy behavior A woman who is in love with you will start to be unusually shy. I dont think Ill be at peace with her in marriage. Ex GIrlfriend blocked me out of the blue! Has it ever gotten better. You will need to know on how to get a Taurus man make a decision due to your current situation. Features: Kris Fluffy named herself aptly - "fluffy" because she says she doesn't shave a single hair on her body. Pros And Cons Of Being A "Baby Face" Woman | Regain Learn more about. Surprise Pregnancy? Here's All of the Advice a Man Needs | GQ 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. You have a hard decision to make. We made it to 8yrs. My current girlfirend got pregnant while on the mini pill. 'I regret having children' In pushing the boundaries of accepted maternal response, women are challenging an explosive tabooand reframing motherhood in the process By Anne Kingston At first. Damaged. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. YES PRO-LIFE HOWEVER THINK ABOUT IT THIS WAY COULD YOU PROVIDE THE BEST FOR THE CHILD? It has been the hardest most brutal experience of my life. 8 Tough Truths to Consider When Your Partner Doesn't Want Kids - HuffPost Plan the best decision that both of you can have to take a good care of the baby. Don't let ANY women determine for you when you will become a father! Take a time to learn from your mistake so that you won't fall into the same problem. Nobody forces you to live with him, if you really don't like him, you can find a job and leave. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. Same boat. He's not in love so he's selfish??? Don't just jump into the discussion; ease your way into it. I hated the way I felt with him. Thanks again JP. This relationship is bad for my wife and me. I'm in love with a married man And his wife is pregnant. She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. Wear a condom, or allow some woman to own your future (and your money) for a couple decades of your life! A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. MzGee Ditches 3Music TV To Take Over Nana Ama McBrowns Show At UTV. Your best bet might be to stay with your gf for now, bond with your child and forge a relationship with him/her. Single. K lemme get one thing straight. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. On the most basic level, these changes, prompted by a flood of hormones during pregnancy and in the postpartum period, help attract a new mother to her baby. Long story as short as possible! You need to discuss with him so that you won't need to face the how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby alone. You both mature guys so kindly sit her down and explain with vital reasons to her as to why just cant marry her but be sure to do it in a spirit of gentleness less you provoke her and all plans fade cos gals can be crazy at times when provoked. Whether the mistake were made with or without your intention, it still your mistake anyway. Perhaps you never talked about having a baby with your partner, or maybe you vaguely mentioned wanting kids "someday." You might've even agreed to try getting pregnant at 25 (or 30 or. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. I don't know how I can be a great weekend father. We are two total opposite people. or you will be 35 and wondering where your life went and if you'll ever be happy. I FEEL SORRY FOR THE GIRL INVOLVED. If thats all he wants, he will be gone. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. Life is beautiful but you don't have a clue Sun and ocean blue Their magnificence, it don't make sense to you Black beauty, oh oh oh Black beauty, oh oh oh I paint the house black My wedding dress black leather too You have no room for light Love is lost on you I keep my lips red To seem like cherries in the spring Darling, you can't let everything I got my, now wife, pregnant but she never loved me, in fact a month before she got pregnant she actually went to spend the night with some dude at a hotel in a different city, but she told me she just wanted to go away for a couple of days. We don't have to be together to love our children. In fact, I was planning on breaking up with him right before I found out I was pregnant. DO YOU WANT TO CHILD TO HAVE A MESSED UP UPBRINGING LIKE YOU DID? You do make a lot of sense and i guess this is the only way forward. hmmmm my advise to u is to pray to God n ask for forgiveness, i wonder the big talk u used on this gal b4 u got her on bed and now ur running frm ur responsibility. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. Eventually I grew to love him, but not the fairy tale kind of love. BUTI had such a crappy childhood, I valued that more than I did my own personal happiness. NOW THE CHILD IS BORN. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). Don't marry someone you don't love. Yes, her hormones will be out of whack. We've been together 9. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. dont do it I married my ex for the same reasons it was terrible for not only us but my children. In fact, before we found out I was pregnant (which was completely unplanned) I was thinking of breaking up with him. What was even worst she call me two days later to ask me if I could pick her up and I did. love should beget love and not hate or fear..something society always fails to learn. Why not abortion?? Might not happen overnight but think of where you want to see yourself in a year. 8 Insults No Woman Ever Deserves (Stop Them Immediately) - Bolde what is de main reason why u do not love her?? We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. The stories of council-flat, benefit scrounger single mums are so far-fetched. If you don't like something about your life, MAKE A CHANGE. Be responsible of your act and decision on something. I don't know if this is pregnancy hormones (I am only 5 weeks) or if I really feel this way. Back then I loved her and I felt sorry for her because she took the decision of getting marry to me even though she didn't love me. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. ALL THIS TRANSLATE TO THE CHILD. not the father, mother or child. I couldn't be myself with him. Sex is the leading cause of babies. She doesn't deserve that. Everything that we do, we have to bear all consequences. 3 Reasons Men Stop Having Sex With Women They Say They Love - YourTango You CAN NOT let someone have the upper hand on you. I've been trying to put my pride/ego/whatever aside and be with her, but it really kills me. Love and Pregnancy: Can a Baby Save Your Struggling Relationship? - Parents As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. It is tough to find time for yourself, let alone your spouse. No need to waste time your life and time on him. This is why i found it hard to break up with her although I'd thought about it many times in the past. My boyfriend and I have only been together since November we had protected sex twice, in December, and I got pregnant. For all the guys out there who think a woman is the stepping stone to the next onewear a condom. But, learning from the past and making it as a lesson is a different story. I find the really difficult and I just have idea what do. When you don't fall in love with your newborn - ABC Everyday I sacraficed my needs for them. bcus a womens cry n tongue is very sharp. I want to be a father!!! Having A Baby With Someone You Don't Want To Be With, How To Deal With It? If you just dont see it working it is better to do it now. Rightfully so! That's what we tackle in today's blog. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. Time to grow up! Glancing over my shoulder in a coffee shop, I saw a couple of women, both bouncing perfectly content babies on their laps. long story short. Opinions please. Otherwise, you will lose the child and her altogether. Want to have sex but not babies? Congratulations, you're like most A year has passed, we have a beautiful little girl that I love with all my heart, but our marriage life is a disaster. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. Adoption is for some people who want to unselfishly make sure the child is cared for and loved by people who can support it just like toughing it out and having the child, supporting it, and loving it is for others. The altnerative is to stay with a woman you don't love and that is a lose-lose all around, even for the kid who will be able to sense his parents don't love each other. He was a rebound for me. Some men can be very guarded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you and leaves you wondering whether he's actually into you. But I don't know if I can be with her for the rest of my life. FTM. There are more than likely services in your area to help you get on your feet (welfare,food stamps,shelter). Good luck to you. What can I do please? The relationship seems new and I know that is hard. What now? May you both be happy and healthy. They were always fighting, unhappy. Suck it up because you didn't do her any favours having to live with you either. "And Maggie Makes Three" is the thirteenth episode of the sixth season of the American animated television series The Simpsons. Everyone has their reasons for doing things and it's not up to us to judge them. . Well of course he would keep the car. I My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. Now she's pregnant. It would not work out for you or for her. I know life would be so much easier if we were together, but I don't know if it's worth it. You would [hopefully] love your child, while also realizing that you shouldn't be having sex with anyone that you don't want to have a baby with. Sorry I must've misread. This is the most stupid guy I have seen in my life twety something years of existance. BE RESPOSIBLE MAKE SURE TO BE THERE FOR THE CHILD. After I really got to know him without drinking and partying, I found out I didn't like his personality. More answers below Quora User Managing Partner (Solicitor) & Mechanical Engineer Author has 20.3K answers and 10.7M answer views 1 y Personally, I think you should only have sex with people you are in love with. Body after birth: 18 post-pregnancy changes to look out for It is helped by a rush of love when the baby arrives, but that doesn't have to be present to create a positive, warm, loving connection which is what love is." For me, even weeks later, those warm . You should have your own baby feelings figured out. We didn't have to be. I am at a loss as to what I must do. After a little while, if you still feel the same (i.e. We can and should celebrate those things while also giving our love and support to those who are struggling to get there, and to those who don't want any part of that scene, ever. Life is too short to spend even one month chained to someone you're not in love with. know it's right to give her the fact straight but she is just a really nice person, and I feel really **** you know! Tell her at home and in private. AND NOW EVERY ONE IS UPHAPPY, MISARABLE, INCLUDING THE CHILD. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. Satisfaction can be found through bringing up children . Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. Knowing that you don't want to have the relationship with someone, you will never be able to fake your feelings for temporary happiness. Even though you never had the intention to have a serious relationship with your current partner, you still need to discuss the problem with him. Because, you are not allowing yourself to have a better relationship, at least with your own self. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has Hi all. It tears me apart. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. I would be too miserable too even think of looking at other women. It's that type of kindness you feel toward someone who's very close to your heart. She is 6 months pregnant now. If You Don't Want a Baby, Just Don't Have Sex? | Libby Anne Anyway, if you don't want to be with her, make that very clear. Couples do stay together when they are not in love, just for the sake of stability for the child.
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