Lets move in together!, One day, a husband told his wife that her rear end was getting so big that it was as big as their grill. 44. So whats it gonna be?, Say in a hushed tone, If you turn me down, then I am gonna tell NASA that you are smoking hot and the real cause of global warming.. Best friends don't care if your house is clean. wheelchair. Boyfriend: Wanna see a magic trick? My Edit: Obligatory "omg so many upvotes/wow RIP my inbox lol/thanks for the gold.". I just need to work out if that's my wife or my girlfriend. It turns out there really is a secret to a happy relationship. If you get sick at the airport, it could be a terminal illness. It's true! Knock, knock. Wanna do something similar this winter?. apparently all a vasectomy does is change the colour of the baby. washing machine? Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? My girl isn't that weak. On a scale of 1 to 10, you are the only 1 for me. I say this because just like treasure, you'll probably need a map and a shovel to find her 38. You are like my dentures. When your girlfriend comes home in a white suit, covered in bee stings and smelling like honey. Leena, who? I watched Bohemian Rhapsody three times in a row, and now I feel a little sick. 37+ Brutal Dark Jokes for The Most Twisted & Morbid Minds Dark jokes usually center around controversial topics. She said I was a The constant beeping was giving me a headache and making me feel sick. I wish I could post this on any other thread. My girlfriend came to me with a balloon that said will you marry me? Me: "Okay. They are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. Churchill, who? After 2 mins all charges were dropped due to the lack of evidence. And most of all, it is important that these two women never meet. From the day you are born, it works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, right up until you fall in love. In all the time I've spent hanging around her house, hiding in the bushes, watching her come and goI've never seen any signs of a stalker. 15. When my girlfriend got pregnant, everything changed. The first time I was at their house, her dad told me we werent allowed to sleep together. apparently all a vasectomy does is change the colour of the baby. 27. My girlfriend was devastated to find out that my mates call me The Love Machine Little did I know that I should have asked for a jury too. I just don't know whether it's my wife, or girlfriend. ago. 4. Unlawful is against the law. I told my girlfriend I think shes cheating on me. sweet potato. Q: What is loud and obnoxious? But if you are hot, you can call me tonight! It is very important to have a woman who can cook, clean, and take care of the kids. She met my parents, brought me dinner and called me honey. Knock, knock. A guy and his girlfriend are talking So he communicates with me a lot and I always make the effort to pretend to listen. You can do it. I lava you. A pair of plane ticket to Paris magically appeared in the wifes hand. Q: What do you call blackbirds that stick together? The first blonde dug a hole, and the second one filled the dirt right back in. It really ruined our 10th anniversary. 07/03/2022 . Knock, knock. first reaction was Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now its gonna taste family. My mother asked him what line he used on me and my boyfriend replied, I just used a modem., I wish men didnt expect me to be skinny, gorgeous and sexy and then make fun of me for the effort it takes. Good idea, I replied. Knock, knock. Because they have little anty-bodies. Halibut, who? She just went to the bathroom. houston methodist willowbrook cafeteria menu; disadvantages of minimally invasive heart surgery Pauline, who? Ive been looking for my ex girlfriends killer for the If I have to choose between men and shoes, I will choose shoes. You can fall from the sky and you can fall from a tree, but the best way for you to fall is to fall in love with me. Whos there? The funniest joke of all time is my love life. 31. As they were leaving the courtroom, the bride said to the groom, Isnt it nice to be here when were not being convicted of something?. My girlfriend is fed up of my constant wordplay jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?" Boyfriend: BAM! Marry Her! When a man goes and steals your wife, the best revenge that you can have is to let him keep her. My wife gets angry that I keep introducing her as my ex-girlfriend. What did the leper say to the sex worker? 26. 40. There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator . My girlfriend's dog died, so to cheer her up I got her an identical one. Some people I love to be around, while some of them are people who I would rather avoid. Norma Lee. The husband said that he was always jealous of the older men with much younger and prettier wives and he wished for a wife who was 20 years younger than him. If youre not sure where to start, no worries! Easter Jokes. But he knew it was <3. Ben, who? "Good idea," I replied. Add a Comment. 13. Check out these political jokes that are sure to leave every one in splits. Equipment. After 2 mins all charges were dropped due to the lack of evidence. Olive, who? Pauline, who? What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend? It was love at first bite! 48. But can I ask you one last question?" Whos there? That's one way of making sure I'll never forget. It was really informative. My girlfriend borrowed $100 from me. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c0\/13004804-1.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-1.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c0\/13004804-1.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-1.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader Image by: Uploader
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/55\/13004804-2.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/55\/13004804-2.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/d\/d1\/13004804-3.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-3.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/d\/d1\/13004804-3.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-3.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/f2\/13004804-4.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/f2\/13004804-4.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/f3\/13004804-5.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-5.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/f3\/13004804-5.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-5.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/f2\/13004804-6.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-6.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/f2\/13004804-6.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-6.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/aa\/13004804-7.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-7.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/aa\/13004804-7.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-7.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/e\/e2\/13004804-8.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-8.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/e\/e2\/13004804-8.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-8.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/4e\/13004804-9.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-9.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/4\/4e\/13004804-9.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-9.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a4\/13004804-10.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-10.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a4\/13004804-10.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-10.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/59\/13004804-11.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-11.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/59\/13004804-11.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-11.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/7\/7a\/13004804-12.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-12.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/7\/7a\/13004804-12.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-12.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c0\/13004804-13.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-13.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c0\/13004804-13.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-13.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/9\/93\/13004804-14.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-14.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/9\/93\/13004804-14.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-14.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c9\/13004804-15.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-15.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c9\/13004804-15.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-15.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/89\/13004804-16.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-16.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/8\/89\/13004804-16.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-16.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/23\/13004804-17.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-17.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/23\/13004804-17.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-17.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/e\/e2\/13004804-18.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-18.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/e\/e2\/13004804-18.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-18.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/7\/7e\/13004804-19.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-19.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/7\/7e\/13004804-19.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-19.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/e\/ea\/13004804-20.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-20.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/e\/ea\/13004804-20.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-20.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/0\/07\/13004804-21.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-21.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/0\/07\/13004804-21.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-21.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/56\/13004804-22.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-22.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/56\/13004804-22.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-22.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/1\/11\/13004804-23.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-23.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/1\/11\/13004804-23.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-23.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/f1\/13004804-24.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-24.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/f1\/13004804-24.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-24.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\nLicense: Creative Commons<\/a>\n<\/p><\/div>"}, {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/5b\/13004804-25.jpg\/v4-460px-13004804-25.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/5b\/13004804-25.jpg\/v4-728px-13004804-25.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"